The Greatest Influence on Your Child's Faith

Parents,

I recently listened to a sermon from pastor with close relationship to our movement, and he asked a simple, yet profound question during one of the services. He asked:

“If we went out to kids ministry right now with a microphone and a camera and said, ‘What’s important to Mom and Dad?’ What would they say?”

Football? Shopping? Golf? Phone? TV? Target? Starbucks?

He later went on to say…

“Children don’t inherit our convictions, they inherit our priorities, meaning they can pick up what you care about even if they don’t understand.”

Revival Starts at Home

Pastor Stacey, our Co-Lead Pastor and New Life Kids Pastor, has a banner in her office that says REVIVAL STARTS WITH THE FAMILY. Simply put, if kids and teenagers are going to have a rich and fulfilling life of faith, the chances of that happening are significantly increased when Jesus is prioritized in the household. And when Jesus is prioritized in the household–more often than not–healthy families flourish. When healthy families flourish, communities can change. When communities change, revival can take place. 

I am finding increasingly, however, that parents want to prioritize Jesus, but a lot of times they don’t know where to start, or feel unqualified. And many, in good faith, relinquish the discipleship of their kids to youth pastors and youth groups with the hope that they will be transformed in that environment. This issue, however, is that students are only in their youth group for a very small portion of their time. 

Parents have unrivaled influence and access in the lives of their kids.

So what does this mean? Should you start attending seminary so you can teach your kids about the Hypostatic Union and how it relates to Jesus' ability to empathize with us? If you're feeling overwhelmed, don't worry.

Discipling kids is less about filling their heads with biblical knowledge and more about modeling a life of dependence on Jesus, showing them that apart from Him, we can do nothing.

How to build up kids who put Jesus first in their lives...

1. You have to live it out.

What would happen if your kids regularly saw you reading your Bible, spending time in prayer, and faithfully gathering with the body of believers? Long before they adopt your beliefs, they'll begin to adopt your rhythms.

Children, especially when they're young, absorb what is normal in the home. They notice what gets your time, your attention, and your affection. When they consistently see you pursuing Jesus, those practices stop feeling like occasional religious activities and start becoming a normal part of everyday life.

Over time, reading Scripture, praying, and being part of the church won't just be things your family does on occasion, they'll become part of your family's priorities. 

2. Give yourself grace. You don't have to be perfect.

If being transparent, many parents would admit they don't feel qualified to be the primary disciplers of their children. They don't feel equipped to teach them about Jesus.

But often, the standard parents hold themselves to is unrealistic. You don't have to be a Bible scholar, attend seminary, or preach a flawless three-point sermon to make Jesus the priority in your home. You don't have to have all the answers, and you don't have to be perfect.

Discipleship begins with one simple step: modeling what it looks like to regularly pursue Christ. Let your kids see you read God's Word. Let them hear you pray. Let them watch you repent, extend grace, and depend on Jesus. When they see that your life is built on His love and grace, they'll learn that following Jesus is about full dependence on Him. 

3. Lean in to the in-between moments.

Discipleship is less about the programs and polished presentations, and more about the intimate conversations and impromptu moments. A child may not remember a 30-minute message, but they will remember and cherish how their parent or a trusted adult prayed with them before big moments of their life. Those types of moments are rarely planned, but they come from an overflow of time with Jesus. The in-between moments are the adhesive that keeps the pursuit of Jesus fresh in a family. And these moments can happen anytime if our hearts are positioned to be led by the Holy Spirit.

Conclusion

So if someone asked your child what Mom and Dad care most about, what would they say? You don't have to become a Bible expert overnight. Simply start pursuing Jesus faithfully, because your children are already following your priorities.